Post by Admin on Jan 17, 2020 1:39:47 GMT
Olympic figure skater Gracie Gold has revealed her fears about returning to the ice after taking more than a year off to seek treatment for anxiety, depression and eating disorders, admitting that she didn't know whether she'd ever be able to compete again.
The 24-year-old, who was just revealed as the newest ambassador for beauty brand Julep, made an incredible comeback at the end of 2019, achieving a bronze medal in her first major competition, earning herself a spot in the National Championships in the process.
But while Gracie might have looked like the epitome of confidence and perfection on the ice, behind the scenes, she admits she wasn't sure whether returning to competition was ever going to be possible.
'When I first laced up skates again, and we were [wondering if] I should try skating again... I want to say I want to say I knew I could do it, in all honesty I was not sure. It didn't seem that feasible,' she told DailyMail.com.
However, her desire to get back out on the ice far outweighed any apprehension about where her comeback might lead; Gracie says she was just determined to get the most out of the experience.
'I thought, if anything, at least I could skate again, at least I could get into shape again, maybe I could do some shows, do some triples,' she recalled.
'Somewhere in between winning the Olympics and maybe doing a couple of doubles again, I had no idea where it was going to go. But we just kind of kept going for it.'
However one thing the 2014 Olympian could be certain of when she stepped back out onto the ice was that she was coming at it with a much healthier, happier mindset than she had ever had in the past - and that is something that she is not willing to compromise for any medal or podium place.
Gracie first sought treatment for anxiety, depression and disordered eating in August 2017, after the Team USA doctor recommended she withdraw from the Grand Prix competition series, and check in to an in-patient facility.
The skating pro, who has since revealed that she became suicidal during her battle with depression, spent 45 days at a rehab in Arizona, during which time she made the decision to go public with her mental health battles - something that no other athlete within the sport had ever really done.
However, what began as a public statement about why she was withdrawing from competition turned into something much more poignant and powerful, and Gracie soon found herself becoming something of an unofficial spokesperson for mental health within the sport.
'In [terms of] the decision to go public and kind of share my story, it really just started in treatment,' Gracie explained.
'We needed a press release about why I was no longer competing in the Grand Prix series, and probably not in the next Nationals. You know, in an Olympic year, there's some heat, and people are looking and from that I expected some blowback.
'And there was plenty, but a lot of it was actually really positive and people wanted to know more about the depression and the anxiety and the eating disorder, some of these other mental health issues.'
The Newton, Massachusetts, native has remained incredibly candid about her treatment and her ongoing recovery, opening up in interviews and on Instagram about her progress - while also advocating for more awareness and openness when it comes to addressing mental health issues among athletes.
'It's not really talked about as often as it should be,' she said. 'It shouldn't be a big deal that an athlete had depression or an eating disorder or anxiety. When you look at it, it comes with the territory.
'But it was such a big deal when I spoke about it because not a lot of other people had. But the more people asked, the more I shared, and it just kind of snowballed from there.'